Hear the Music

2006-08-19T14:47:00.000-07:00

I've had the occasion today to look over the history of my life again. For those friends and acquaintances of mine who visit this blog, I recommend self-study. "Where are you coming from, and where are you going?" asks Socrates to Phaedrus.

What has strucken me today is the importance of finding a logos for something. The English word I would use is "account." One of the most striking things to ever occur for me, and grounding of some sort, was the discovery of the truth for my last name. It used to be Chow or Chow-Allen depending on an institution's records, and now it is Allen.

During my senior spring semester in the Torrey Honors Program, I participated in the Divine Comedy metatorrey class. Near the end of that semester I was probably more comfortable in the class to speak of deeper personal things, and in one class it happened that our discussion came across the importance of names. What is the significance of a name? This question arose as a necessary tangent to approach a deeper understanding of the Divine Comedy.

Yet, in that discussion, I was fortunate to look at myself at the same time. I have names as well. But in that moment I awoke and was stunned by the presence of truth. I had not thought about that! Who am I? At the time I perhaps should have asked who I was at that moment, or where I was at that moment, but, that stunning yet beautiful moment opened me to the truth.

I spent the next year thinking over this, and had several conversations with friends and family.

I would not trade that moment for anything. Truth is far beyond the food you eat, the car you drive, the rent-money you slave for, and I should say to Eric Matthew Allen, the video games I play. There are many other things of trivial importance.

But, my reader, if you do not see this, when will you see trivial things as really trivial, and wake up? I have no reason to lie to you and I do not want your money or praise. I do not post often because I have no wish to give you trivial things. This is like the treasure which Dante found in Paradise, open to each of us who can make the journey. I do not know Plato and Dante in comparison, but I can say that the darkest night can be the most liberating moment in light of the truth.

But if you do see this, where have you come from, and where are you going?

2006-06-18T15:22:00.000-07:00

Wow. It's not every day that I run into political philosophy. This may make you shift in your seat.

At the library today I checked up on my overdue books. Of course, I have overdue fines, which I don't want to pay. Paying means less money towards things which are necessary and things which are good (I'd like to believe).

I didn't mind the lesser fees, but what I did mind was the unknown fee for a book borrowed by interlibrary loan. It's one of those rare books which seem to be very wise. I would rather keep that book.

And so my desire to keep this book brought me to think, "Perhaps if the fee is the same as the book itself, I will choose to not return it and pay the fine for it." This seems to be fair.

But then again, the book does not belong to me. It belongs to the public. I've agreed to borrow books from libraries, not buy them after trying them. Fines are customary and their purpose is to penalize our negligence that we would return what is not ours.

But I don't understand the basis for these opinions.

Is it morally wrong to pay the 'lost fine' to keep a book which does not belong to me and which is not lost? Is my consumer paradigm just in this situation?

I think for my own good I will keep in mind that desire for the book should not lead my thinking. I will return the book so that I will not have a conflict of interest within me. In that way I will be able to preserve my reasoning.

What is common property? Or what are the laws on common property in the United States? What is private property? etc. Are they good?

It now occurs to me that the same thing has occurred to me at Blockbuster, which is a private property situation rather than a common property situation. In that case I paid the full price of the DVD.

2006-06-06T03:23:00.000-07:00

God, I love studying and discussing a text with friends.

The truth awaits.

2006-01-21T21:54:00.000-08:00

Face to face, or eye to eye, parallelism is beautiful. To look at one another in such a matter is not only to communicate with words and emotion but to present one's own natural beauty to each other.

No, I'm not dating anyone. I work at Hollywood Video and meet many people.

2005-09-05T14:20:00.000-07:00

It's official: I'm going for my dream of professorship. I'm studying Christian Scripture and Greek right now, and my own rule of study includes these two things.

The determination of Vincent of the movie Gattaca is in my mind. Only he could attain his own fate, as he fought for his window of opportunity, much like the window of launch-time of a space shuttle. The stars will align for each of us only if we keep the heavens in sight, and with patient, vigorous long-suffering do whatever is necessary to be fit for our journey.

Tragedy and failure are never options we will choose. They are not important now. The stars are. For all things here are to be seen in their light, and beyond the stellatum lies the Empyrean where my Lord reigns. He has gone before.

2005-08-12T23:26:00.000-07:00

-- "Each deed is the worse or the better, but no one of men himself in all respects is wise." (Chase and Phillips' A New Introduction to Greek)

-- “The experiences that do not provoke thought are those that do not at the same time issue in a contradictory perception. Those that do have that effect I set down as provocatives, when the perception no more manifests one thing than its contrary, alike whether its impact comes from nearby or afar." (Republic, 523a ff)

Say I am learning how to shoot a basketball accurately and get a swish every time. I practice every day, and each day increases my precision. Today my shot is better than yesterday, but it is also worse than my shot tomorrow.

My shot today is both better and worse. Tomorrow it will be better and worse.

What is the better?

It seems to me that the better is a movement towards the good and away from the bad. We could investigate more into what is this movement.

A tutor who notices that his student solves a particular type of problem with more ease than before praises him: "Good!" This strikes me as peculiar. It seems at first that we say the better is the good, but this doesn't seem right.

The good, as I understand it in a "strict" sense, is the best, or the perfect. Ho agathos anthropos, the good man. We can say that Jesus Christ is the good man, and we all fall short of His measure of humanity.

To become better in something is good, for how could it be bad? Perhaps someone will say that to become better in lying is not good, but bad. I will attempt a first look at this soon enough -- for now it seems good to say that to become better in lying is to become a worse person.

The better is not the good, but to become better is good. This seems to make sense because where else can imperfection go? For now it seems we have come to the proverb, "the perfect is the enemy of the good."

2005-07-14T18:24:00.000-07:00

What about wisdom?

Who ever thought that maxims could suffice for knowing wisdom, which concerns the good of all things? How quickly can our actions be judged? In the complexity of human beings and the blind, ugly opinions we have, what pride we have!

Damn the so-called charity of action! It does without thinking, without consideration, without learning, in fact, it doesn't do much at all, except accidentally! How mechanical our souls have become!

You, wise one, show me charity with wisdom and I'll consider your god.

Nietzche saw some of the truth. Will you consider the criticism of one who sees from the outside?

2005-07-14T18:15:00.000-07:00

How innocent are we when we enter this world? Augustine's Confessions tells of the tyranny of children. Children who demand the fulfillment of their desires, and revenge themselves on the disobedient by crying, disobeying, etc. This is reasonable.

But what of the innocence of the intellect? How should anyone understand evil? I see evil, I see a fellow man hurting another intentionally, yet he does it in ignorance. He does not understand what he is doing.

I see this, and I see it in ignorance as well. Why should this be? How will we learn better?

2005-07-14T18:03:00.000-07:00

Let me sit in this meditation on evil.

Dare I say this: the prevalence of evil stuns me. It is so near, and even within me. The weight of one crushed life, or one tragedy, is horrible.

Yet how many people exist on Earth today? 6,446,131,400 according to the CIA's estimates: http://www.cia.gov/cia/publications/factbook/rankorder/2119rank.html

Six billion, four hundred and forty-six million, one hundred and thirty-one thousand, and four hundred people suffer. Hatred, envy, incontinence, ignorance...

Humanity reeks in the nostrils of God. We reek in the nostrils of God.

2005-05-16T17:06:00.000-07:00

On Fasting

"Fasting is the advocate of repentance. Adam and Eve disobeyed God; they refused to fast from the forbidden fruit. They became slaves of their own desires. But now through fasting, through obedience to the rules of the Church regarding the use of spiritual and material goods, we may return to the life in Paradise, a life of communion with God. Thus, fasting is a means of salvation, this salvation being a life we live in accordance with the Divine will, in communion with God."

This is amazing. I can taste joy when I read this. What beautiful stories the Church can tell! And how practical this option lies before me! Should I not take this up in accord with the Church? What good awaits me?

2005-05-06T14:51:00.000-07:00

How is our theology informing our philosophy? Or perhaps that is too abstract. To mimic our friend and mentor John Mark, What does Jesus have to do with Plato? I ask this question for the sake of integrity, because I used to have two blogs. One was "Christian" and "devotional." The second was "Platonic" and "musical." Both I believe had shadowy inklings, however right or wrong, of Truth Himself and His creation.

This seems to be the start of a "Christian Platonist" language. How much of a "Christian Platonist" language have you developed since participating in the Torrey Honors Institute and becoming a member at graduation? Who else is developing such a language?

If indeed the kosmos was made through and for Christ, with spiritual, intelligible, and sensible dimensions, it seems we must cultivate a language particular to our lives which has unity, just as Plato seems to communicate a unified and consistent kosmos through words in any particular dialogue.

We seem to be a rare breed.

2005-04-17T09:57:00.000-07:00

Anxiety is from a lack of faith in the Good. I fear that I will perish, that evil will win. That faith seems to be stronger with more insight. How do we get insight into the goodness of God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit?

To answer in a "Platonic" fashion, experience of those things which participate in God is a beginning (though do not worship them):

"It wouldn't be at all easy to tell someone else. But you, I
suppose, will grant me this."

"What?"

"Since fair is the opposite of ugly, they are two."

"Of course."

"Since they are two, isn't each also one?"

"That is so as well."

"The same argument also applies then to justice and injustice,
good and bad, and all the forms; each is itself one, but, by
showing up everywhere in a community with actions, bodies, and
one another, each is an apparational many."

"What you say," he said, "is right" (Republic 475e6-476a8).

What participates in God?

1. Holy Scripture is breathed by God (2 Tim 3:16).
2. The Sacraments, according to Christian Tradition and experience.
3. The Body of Christ as led by the Holy Spirit.
4. Parts of the kosmos under good stewardship.

To the degree things participate in God, the more they seem to
be under His Lordship. This by definition is the Kingdom of
God.

The Kingdom of God is at hand (Mark 1:14).

-----

The great evils we experience are rooted, supposedly, in the
twisting of great goods. For instance, a giant of incredible
muscular strength can do great physical harm (assuming it is
without good reason).

Is good more powerful than evil? Perhaps it would be good to
look at Boethius' The Consolation of Philosophy (Boethius was a
Christian politician, philosopher, and theologian around 500
AD).

A further line of investigation would be to examine what seem
to be great evils of the past. If Boethius, or Philosophy
persuades us about the power of good over evil then we may have
more faith and hope in God. We should love Him more as the
source of all good.

2005-04-15T11:21:00.000-07:00

A shout-out to the Holy Spirit! The Spirit of Truth, who will lead us into the Kingdom of God, with the Father and the Son.

On another note: the Fellows at the Trinity Forum Academy will have an all-night reading of the Divine Comedy! May the Spirit bless our reading with the prayers of Dante Aligheri. Amen.

2004-09-12T21:15:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I'm asked the question, "What did you think of x?" X usually happens to be a long speech or a series of speeches on a subject, such as a book. The question addresses the entirety of the speech, with all its details. How is one to communicate every thought in response to every word, sentence, argument, and story/myth in a speech? The answer to that question seems to be: another speech.

Yet this seems silly and precludes dialogue between two people. Clarity of communication, disputation, and the open-ended nature of discussion are impossible if one person is passively letting a speech pour into his ears.

What is a better question?

2004-09-05T23:54:00.000-07:00

The Japanese Muse is a trip. Genres range from action/adventure to romance to collect-your-favorite-monster, but the artwork is very attractive. What I am most interested in is what kind of beliefs are reflected in Japanimation, or Anime, and what seems to be consistent. Some of the series I see in brief have strong spiritual slants (perhaps very strange to our habits of secular thought). However the ones I have seen in my years at college include DragonBall Z, Love Hina, Cowboy Bebop, Record of Lodoss War, and the Gundam series.

My favorite series is Gundam Wing, which seems to score big in every area. The plot begins in the year AC (After Colony) 195, several generations after humans have successfully created habitable colonies in space. The colonies are contrasted to the current world government on Earth, known as the Earth Sphere Alliance. The Earth and Space. Nature and technology. That is a common theme among many explored in this epic series. To get back on track, what makes the plot epic is that the series begins with the colonies sending five mysterious shuttles to Earth, each equipped with a pilot and his legendary humanoid ship, a Gundam. Tension already exists between Earth and Space and the plot thickens.

Series such as the old-school Voltron of the 80s and Mighty Morphin Power Rangers include humanoid ships, also known as mecha. And the glitz and glamour of their machines combining to defeat threatening evil seems to be the focus. But for Gundam Wing the poet behind the series makes clear that he is concerned about people. For instance the central character of the series, Heero Yui (the first name should ring a bell if we pay attention to it), appears to us when he is about to enter the Earth's atmosphere. The special forces of the Earth Sphere Alliance, known as Oz, catches onto him and a masked lieutenant named Zechs Merquise makes an important quote: "It's not the [mobile] suit we're after, it's the pilot." He says this after soldiers underneath him marvel at the abilities of the Gundam.

The characters in Gundam Wing each hold separate philosophies of war, peace, and life. They come from monarchal, aristocratic, democratic, and tyrannic backgrounds. They come from the West, East, and Space. Yet this is not just complexity to make your eyes dazzle, since the 49 episodes and 3 movie episodes of plot development bring the characters into conflict with one another, and they grow as their beliefs are challenged.

What are some of the beliefs in conflict? Pacifism, Eastern warrior thought, and the idea of Just War are all carefully yet enigmatically woven together to fight for the solution to War. Humanity and the use of technology are put to the test, and the duty of a soldier is formed during actual battle. There's several more themes to catch while watching the series, and I've found more every time I've watched it.

Artistically the animation is superb and the music is well-written. Colors are used symbolically (pay attention to the colors of clothing, machines, etc) throughout. The camera shots inform the viewer of all the characters' viewpoints and the various angles of the scene so that space and depth is well-grasped.

Classical allusions to Greek thought and Shakespeare show that this Anime series, though from the East, is a strong dose of Western thought in the midst of the majority of Anime series. For instance, the dualism of good and evil is present but not present. I'll leave it up to the interested viewer to figure this out.

Gundam Wing is a well-crafted anime on all levels. It has several morals which it wishes to communicate but allows this to come about naturally through the movement of the plot and its characters. I recommend it.

2004-08-13T16:02:00.000-07:00

Five minutes a day. A good friend recommended that I study ancient Greek five minutes a day. Over a couple years the difference I can read a Platonic dialogue as it was meant to be. Brilliant! I've followed his advice for several days -- here I go!

Patience, devotion, attention to patterns and minute details, and repetition are a few things I have gained from studying classical music. They all apply to my readings of Plato.

--

Music, I think, would be interesting if it were for the sake of instructing souls and/or dialoguing with them. Neither of these are considered seriously today.

Directors and performers bring into time a musical piece of a composer. For what reason?

Beauty? Is beauty always to be sought?

The glory of God? What is the glory of God? How do musicians bring glory to God (wow this sounds like Ion)? What of the music itself?

I haven't understood the speeches of my teachers...whether I agree with them after understanding is another thing.

2004-07-27T19:32:00.000-07:00

Plato's Gorgias begins with a discussion of rhetoric among Socrates, Chaerophon, Polus, Gorgias, and Callicles. Chaerophon is the friend of Socrates which heard the oracle's divination that Socrates is the wisest man at that time, Polus appears to be a student of Gorgias, who is a rhetorician, and Callicles appears to be a statesman.

The discussion leads, according to Socrates, towards the "most important matters" for a man to discuss, and along the way it suggests a moral imperative for poets and performers of music.

I'll leave it to the interested reader to form an opinion about what those "most important matters" are in Socrates' eyes (I'm still figuring that out) as well as how music and other arts fit in.

2004-07-20T00:01:00.000-07:00

Actually, if you want food for thought for Ion, go read the work with a friend and have the two of you dialogue. Some beginning questions:

Assuming the dialogue is about Ion due to its name, what do we learn about Ion?

What about Socrates? What significance is his part in the dialogue?

Does an art of rhapsody exist? What does Socrates have to say on this? What does Ion have to say on this? Is this applicable to music performance?

Does Ion know what he is talking about?

How does Socrates describe the effects of Homer's music? Is this consistent with our culture's experience of music? What are the viewpoints of the modern music conservatory and your music teachers?

2004-07-05T00:42:00.000-07:00

This Friday I and some friends will discuss Plato's dialogue Ion. The person of Ion is a rhapsode, or vocal performer, of Homer's epics, and Socrates talks with him. So prima facie this appears to be relevant to those who study in a music conservatory of today. This will be my second read and my first discussion of the dialogue. Stay tuned as I plan to share some food for thought.

2004-05-15T16:46:00.000-07:00

This past Saturday in our orchestra and chorale's rehearsal of Brahm's Requiem I had an interesting experience. There were three strong thoughts which arose as I listened to the music and participated in it. These thoughts made me shudder at their beauty, and I think it is because of my experience and dialogue with Brahm's music.

Before I speak of these thoughts, let me clarify my current opinion of what it means to dialogue with music: composers, for various reasons/paradigms, make an aural image. These musical images directly reflect, or imitate, certain kinds of truth.

For now I will speak of one kind: the idea of relationship in music. If one has learned to listen sharply to a musical work, he will recognize that the individual parts are related to one another. They work together and constitute the entire image. Sometimes they are in unison, sometimes they are in harmony, other times they develop one another, and other times they fight.

As an example of harmony, the Ainurlindale of Tolkien's Silmarillion shows the creation of Ea through the music of the Ainur. They each take up their part of the entire creative vision of Iluvatar.

As a person, I have a strong relational emphasis in how I see life, and so I dialogue with Brahms' Requiem by asking what relational truths might be found in music. And this is heightened through the participation of my mind and body.

So here are the thoughts which arose from the dialogue:

First, I realized that Brahms' or his music, or perhaps beautiful music in general, calls us into deep and beautiful community. Yet it is so beautiful that it cannot be appreciated and performed justly without everyone's blood, sweat, and tears. Our culture today is so efficient and demanding for simple, immediate pleasures (often base), that it is hard to seek beauty.

The relational nature of music requires each person to understand that they must listen to other parts in order to understand their own. To translate this thought into a question for the individual, "How can one 'Know thyself' without knowing what he is not?"

Yet we are to go beyond the self. We learn to enjoy the music of humanity (though not always perfect) as a whole. When we listen to Brahms' Requiem, we strive to listen not only to individual parts, but their fundamental relationships and development, as well as their context within the greater structure of seven movements.

This is "big picture" thinking. Marva Dawn uses the structural image in "A Royal 'Waste' of Time", where she compares the biblical history of mankind as seven movements of a musical work. If we can learn to appreciate Brahms' music maybe we can appreciate God's music.

The second thought I had during rehearsal: I realized that I had long forgotten the beauty and pleasure of playing in tune with another person. It seems better than playing by one's self. My pride, fear, and weak listening skills had prevented this for a long time.

Relationally speaking, when I compare my desire to be alone (God forbid) and this image of community in the Requiem I find the desire to be fundamentally alone small.

Practically speaking, when I sense tension/discord between myself and another whom I am seeking deeper friendship, I should listen to that person more and reconsider my own nature. I must believe that a music exists for the two of us to be called into, because of our One Faith. Perhaps this is the unity Christ prays for us in John. How can we have a vision of what that beauty is, so that we can seek it together?

And the third thought: I thought of the music of the heavens in Dante's Paradise. Does that beauty call us to tune ourselves to it? What does it mean to be in harmony with Nature? For Dante it seems he must have a vision of God:

High phantasy lost power and here broke off;
Yet, as a wheel moves smoothly, free from jars,
My will and my desire were turned by love,

The love that moves the sun and the other stars.

2004-05-03T16:36:00.000-07:00

The Biola Symphonic Winds had a wonderful concert this past Saturday. It was amazing how everyone worked together in the past two and a half weeks. Was God behind all of this? It seems that everything "fell into place".

But often I am shy to ask a person on how they knew God's hand was in their experience.

To point out general extremes, assuming that God exists, one is that God pulls the strings of puppets, and the other is that we do all the work. A weaker version of the former is that man is so unworthy that only God can justly receive praise in work.

So in reflection the director of the Symphonic Winds, Robert Feller, thanked his good friends for their help, especially his wife in a special romantic moment, and he thanked the Winds as well. Another member of the ensemble commented on how she saw godly character in each of us. No puppet strings/possession here.

Did we do all the work ourselves? It looks like it to myself, but maybe there are some clues in God's role through that member's observation of our godly character. One, we act like God because we are made in His image. Self-sacrifice, charity, servanthood, diversity, and unity were all there. Two, this image is restored by the work of the Spirit of Christ, the risen Lord.

Perhaps God is involved in a hierarchial manner, by providentially delegating responsibilities to each of us and encouraging us to act in a manner that is worthy of Him.

When does the Creator of the universe act in His fullness (whereas this past experience of mine seems not as direct intervention of God, whatever that is)?

More thoughts for later...

2004-05-03T02:48:00.000-07:00

Today the orchestra and chorale performed the 4th movement of Brahm's German Requiem. It is the middle of a chiasm of 7 movements. Here were the main words of the song:

How lovely is Thy dwelling place...

It struck me that it was not the beautiful music that I wanted to hear, but whatever Brahms was referring to.

There have been times in the past when I would fixate on the music, as if that was the source of my joy...but what has brought about this praise?

When do we get to write psalms?

2004-04-25T19:26:00.000-07:00

No theme have I known,
Though I hear pitches
Of silver and gold.
Confusion wins the day.

2004-04-24T13:28:00.000-07:00

One question I have held onto was spoken by a good friend about two years ago:

"Why is it that musicians do not understand that the harmony of the music they play (ideally speaking) is a significant image for them to understand?"

My response right now is that no one points it out to them. The imagination is not exercised.

It is true that poetic mysticism looks like a waste of time in the face of pragmatism, and pragmatism looks unromantic in the face of mysticism.

Neither will work if we want a life lived in accord with Truth. My aim here, in this blog, is to tie the worlds together in word.

But at the end of the day if I am to have any respect for myself I will then live with integrity, by God's grace.

"Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven."

2004-04-24T00:27:00.000-07:00

This musician was disturbed by a jukebox, for its song was forced upon his ears, affecting his body and soul. He was not in harmony with the song and a subtle dissonance arose. It hurt him.

"Leave that place to find concord within and without."

To the trees he went, whose accompanying benches let him sit to find rest. A book tempted the musician, it was even silver with a tree, but he could not read.

"Not yet."

He sat and his eyes grew fond of something. He saw a million small leaves, the slim branches which traced their inner ends, and the bark which seemed to have paths to travel, all friendly to one another. He then heard the breeze play through the leaves, both singing sweetly. It seemed to the musician that he should stay...

After much listening to the harmony of the tree, he looked upon the ground to see the words:

"By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him. In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins."

How could this be here? the musician asked. Unity seemed to be lost with these words. In hope, need, and love he looked elsewhere.

"I am the Light of the world. Seek the pleasurable harmony among Men, for if your soul delights in the trees and the wind you will find joy in the Music of Lords and Servants."

Then the musician was tuned to the harmony of where he now sat, with the leaves, branches, bark, Atonement, and Light. Satisfied, he immediately got up and walked to the Conservatory to play his part.

2004-04-24T00:26:00.000-07:00

This blog is dedicated to the divination that a training in classical music, through composition, conducting, performance, and education prepares one to understand the deeper things of life.

Instrumental people I must thank by their wisdom and encouragement: Dr. Reynolds, Director of the Torrey Honors Institute at Biola University, Dr. Browning of the Biola Conservatory of Music, Dr. Geier of the University of Rochester, Andy Ferguson, and Nancy Pearcy.

Timothy Motte, Eric Holloway, Eddie Sywulka, and Kevin Phillips I thank for bearing with me.

I also dedicate this to my fellow musicians in Crowell Hall of Biola University. They are most likely to understand my musings and from the beginning I have wanted to travel with them through dialogue. Though time passes swiftly for us and dialogue is very rare, I hope some of you will listen up.